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My Sweet Father

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The loss that I feel Everything reminds me of you The you that's no longer here Every news of death All I can think about is you You left a hole in me A hole that can't be filled No matter how desperately I wanted to Please, let me I don't want to feel this pain anymore Not that I don't accept the fate, the timing of God I just want you to be here with me again To be able to listen to your comforting words To be able to make you laugh To be able to run to you, jump on you and stroke your hair until you fall asleep To be able to say "I love you pa. Forever and always" I'll see you in Jannah, my sweet father. Alfatihah...

#Skincare - CeraVe ; Go or No Go?

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      Hey guys! On 8th Feb, I posted on my social media that I'm trying a new skin regime with all CeraVe's products and promised to give an update here in 2 weeks time (oops). There's a delay because I thought I'd have glass skin by now but hahahahahahahaha, NOPE!  There ain't drastic changes on my face but read on for my thoughts on each products.   Here are the product range I bought on Shopee after doing an online analysis from CeraVe's website HERE  where you can take it before deciding on which skincare that's best for your skin. As I am of combination skin, I have parts of oily and dry skin on my face, the website suggested I get these - CeraVe Foaming Facial Cleanser, CeraVe AM & PM Moisturizing Lotion. I was super ecstatic that their AM moisturizer have SPF combination because I have not yet found SPF that's suitable for my skin and I know how important it is for us. All the SPF products I tried before leave my skin feel sticky and I feel li

Ain't All Roses & Sunshine

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I promise myself that I'll be 99% candid/frank about everything I write from now on, no matter how uncomfortable the topics are. Today is one of the day. That 1% will be between Allah and I. Smile. I feel like people see me as having it all, without having any difficulties in life. Welp, that ain't true. 'Cos what you see on my social media are my highlight reels; the things that I'm grateful for. No one sees the ugly side, the rocky mountains I have to climb.  You didn't see I broke down crying in the toilet of the hospital's emergency dept this morning just 'cos I cant pee in a cup correctly. Seems miniscule right...but not to me. I felt so frustrated. Peeing in a cup for years was not a problem. Somehow it is a struggle for me now. And to have people ridicule your struggle? That's just the icing on top. It took me almost 3 hours to get it right. I had to buy 2 bottles of water to fill the tank. Finally did it when mama brought me a plastic

Mak / Mummy / Madre / Maminka / Moeder / Mëmë / Majka

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My syurga dunia akhirat SMOOCH!       Different panggilan what with the same meaning - our first love, mother. The one who gave us lives in exchange of hers. The one who put her children's needs in front of hers. The one who'd take a bullet for us in a heartbeat. This lady right here...I called her Ma or Mama. Korang kalau dapat teka the origin of the languages of these panggilan of mak dekat tajuk atas tu, komen kat bawah nanti ok? Tengok siapa pandai, hehe.       I know Mother's Day is long gone but tonight I wanna write about her because she deserves to know she is loved and appreciated even it is hard for her to believe. To be frank, our relationship were not the best growing up. I always think of her as a strict and un-fun mother as she was always in her teaching mode, always ready to step in highlighting what I did wrong and showed me the right way to do it. Being a kid and teen after, weh geram kot macam ugh, hidup is for tenang and fun. Seriously rasa mak

Diary Ramadhan 2020

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Assalamualaikum, hi guys! :) Holy macaroni, it has been 4 years since I've updated this blog!       Last post were on March 2016. So in between that until now, I've been having a great career as Nadilah Champion Proton @ Proton Edar Larkin helping out my clients owning their dream cars with ease AND I've had 4 more nieces and nephews to love and to cherish until my last breath. Pheew, and a lot more in between.       This particular post is to celebrate my 2020's Ramadhan which was beautiful, alhamdulillah. So all the things happened in between tu nanti lah posts lain eh kalau rajin nak menulis lagi, haha!       We started fasting on 23rd of April; I was looking forward on achieving my personal goal on finishing the whole Al-Quran on the holy month...starting from surah Al-Fatihah, even though I stopped in the middle of the Quran from the last time I read it. Rasa nak start fresh, I don't know why.       If you remember the post from 2009 r